A Reflection: Next Gen Parenting Part 3

In this third part of the A Reflection: Next Gen Parenting series, we would like to continue sharing with you what we have learned in our parenting journey over the past 28 years of nurturing our three boys into young adulthood. In the last article, we shared about Identifying and Maximizing Talent and Enjoying Every Stage of Parenting, which you can read here: A Reflection: Next Gen Parenting Part 2. If you’d like to catch up from the beginning, you can find all the articles here: Next Gen Parenting Series.

Apply Team Synergy and Leveraging

We can succeed in both marriage and parenting as well as in our chosen career. We don’t need to achieve one at the expense of the other. If you think otherwise, that’s why you failed. From day one, we made up our minds that we would not choose a career (no matter how big the pay package was) that would damage our marriage and the parenting of our children. We did not want to simply provide material needs. We were fully aware that our children had emotional and spiritual needs too.

“It’s pointless to make so much money, if as parents we end up losing our children!”

We must think synergy as a team and apply the power of team leveraging instead of selfish individualized or compartmentalized success. For example, two are better than one because they will have a better return of their labor.[1] One can chase a thousand but two can chase ten thousand. Yes, as husband and wife, we can achieve ten times more what we can on our own as individuals. Can you imagine the compounding or exponential growth, if we are also developing synergy, unity of faith, vision and values with our children?

Developing Financial Intelligence (FQ)

Since their early schooling years, our children have been learning how to fish for themselves. We only provided them with basic food, clothing and shelter, education and extra-curriculum activities that would contribute to their overall holistic development i.e. their physical, mental or emotional, spiritual, and social development.[2] From young, we showed them how to apply this formula: MSI = PSI + ASI; where MSI = Multiple Sources of Income, PSI = Primary Source of Income and ASI = Additional Sources of Income.

  • When our kids were under our financial support, their PSI = Monthly Allowance. We gave them just a little more than their monthly basic survival needs. Of course, all meals with us were covered by us. At the end of each month, if they managed their finances well and showed a surplus i.e. a profit, we would reward them with an equivalent amount. This helped them to manage their cash flow well using what they were entrusted with.
  • With their savings, our children needed to think of legal and ethical projects for generating their own ASI. They were responsible for paying for their own mobile, internet, and phone bills. My wife and I only covered the common household expenses.
  • To develop an enterprising spirit in our children, if they proposed a worthwhile project, we would do a cost-benefit analysis and assess the return of investment with them. Often, they had to present the proposal during our weekly family meeting for everyone to evaluate and decide ‘Go‘ or ‘No-Go‘. To this day, we continue to avail ourselves as “Angel Investor cum Mentor” to our adult children.

“Financial education must be modelled by parents from young at home”

Catch the final part in this series: A Reflection: Next Gen Parenting Part 4

About the Authors: Dr Peter Ting is the President/CEO of Family First Malaysia. He and his wife, Dr Abby Ting, are committed to TRANSFORMING Next Gen Fathers, supported by Mothers, to build Better Families, resulting in a Better Workplace, a Better Society and a Better Nation. They are also co-authors of a book titled “3F Next Gen Leadership”.

Since 2014, Dr Peter uses his time to mentor Gen-Y CEO Couples and Gen-Z leaders, who are tomorrow’s entrepreneurs. Dr Abby continues to be the best helper to Dr Peter in their shared vision to reach every generation and build better families everywhere.

For more about them, find their profiles on our trainers’ page.


[1] This is a universal principle stemming from biblical wisdom recorded in Ecclesiastes 4:9, exhorted by King Solomon, the wisest and richest man in the world during his time.

[2] We modeled our parenting principles after the holistic lifestyle development of Jesus that nurtured Him in growing in stature, in wisdom, and in favor with God and also with people (see Luke 2:52).